My Lenten promise this year is two-fold.
One: to write here everyday except Sunday.
Two: to think ONE kind thing about myself everyday.
I am in serious need of some “renewing the spirit of the mind” (Ephesians 4). I realised today that overall, my mind does not say kind things to me. It tends to say things like, “you don’t know how to do that” or “you suck at this” or “you’ll never figure it out” or the very worst, “you’re going to fail and ruin everything”.
Insidious isn’t it? Well, until you actually write it out and realise how silly those thoughts are, huh? You should try it if you haven’t: write out the things those unkind voices say to you. Somehow, writing them out takes all the power out of them! Or at least, a LOT of power out of them.
Anyway, this morning, as I was praying, I wondered aloud how Jesus battled those sorts of thoughts. I mean, talk about bold and confident; think of the things He walked around doing! Imagine ordering the lame man to walk, and then falling flat on your face if he didn’t! With all those people watching!
That takes some serious cojones, my friend.
When I asked Him where He got His confidence, it occurred to me that it wasn’t that He was so confident in His own abilities. It would seem much more like Christ to be confident in His Pappa, in how much He loved His little boy that He would always catch Him before He hit the ground hard (which is why the cross is such a heartbreaking concept to bear). Jesus worked out of that one moment in the river Jordan when God said “This is my Son in whom I am well pleased”.
If we’re honest with ourselves, haven’t we heard that in one form or another about ourselves even once?
I’m realising that it’s ok to embrace that, to be proud of that, to own it. God loves me. He’s proud of me. Even though I mess up all the time, He sees my heart and He’s cheering for me.
Because that’s the key.
I asked myself this morning, how would I act differently if I KNEW that God was going to catch me when I jumped?
That it didn’t matter what it looked like, whether there were snakes below me, or roaring rip-tides or just hundreds of feet of nothing… that God would catch me anyway? That if I have given my life over to Him, He has my back?
I think I would act a little differently, don’t you?
So, that’s my little message today. For me, for you… renew your mind. And then… jump.